Breaking News: McHale plans “I Told You So” tour

(Useless Press Incorporated – Los Angeles, CA – January 18, 2009)

In a first for a demoted NBA basketball executive or newly hired head coach, Minnesota Timberwolves Head Coach Kevin McHale plans to announce during the half-time of Monday’s game against the Los Angeles Clippers dates for a summer “I Told You So” tour, as a rebuttal for all those fans, journalists, bloggers and various media sports personalities who doubted his ability to put together a competent NBA roster as well as his coaching ability, according to an unnamed source.

“Yeah, it might be premature”, commented the source, “but I gotta tell you, he’s been chomping at the bit to do this. I mean, he’s been a triple threat exec for this franchise: broadcasting, vice-president, and coach. In fact, he’s proving that he’s just about the only one who can coach his selections. Everyone else just kind of falls short. He’s succeeding beyond even his wildest dreams.”

Among the plans for the summer tour, or caravan as it was called last year, is a reunion of the 70’s rock band Orleans, who will kick off the event with a theme of “Still the One”, one of their biggest hits. “After all the grief he’s taken over the years, I think this will be sweet justice, especially if they can make it back to 30 wins this season. He’s really proud of the fact Kevin Love and Randy Foye are starting to emerge as core pieces for this team. I have no doubt that if he wants it, he’ll be back as VP of this club before long, in addition to coaching. He’s even thinking of growing a beard like Popovich, just to give him that edgy, Van Gogh elitist look.”

More details to follow…

****UPDATE****

January 19, 2009 - Los Angeles, CA

According to sources, due to the MLK day celebration, the upcoming Obama inauguration, and at least a couple of more wins, Timberwolves Head Coach Kevin McHale has decided to postpone the official "I Told You So" announcement.